EULOGY

It is said that death is not that great period that ends the sentence of life rather it is a comma that punctuates us into a loftier existence…

It is also written, “Oh death, where then is your sting? Oh grave where then is your victory?”

For me, there is nothing to fear when we think of death… It is the destiny of all that lives, indeed.  Whether a politician, police officer, pauper or pope we all must die.  It is the common denominator of humankind.  Our destiny is tied inextricably with the destiny of the earth; and as the earth moves from winter to spring, spring to summer, and summer to fall in a beautiful cycle of life, death and rebirth, we too must, as we are children of the earth.

Those that leave us, it seems to me, do not face anything more than a wonderful peace that truly surpasses all of our understanding.  Whether eternity is in some loftier existence or in the depths of non-existence, I truly believe it is peaceful.  Wherever it is we go, we escape the tug of war this life brings with all of its virtue and vice. If you were to go down into the deepest ocean, or in the depths of space, I am told that we “no not” whether we are north, south, east or west.  We are just there, one with all that exists, and there are no time issues, no places to rush off to; no illness to deal with.  It is in a way Nirvana—perfect bliss, when we exist beyond the dualism of our world. 

If there is pain, it is the sting that lives within us here who remain.   We have to grapple with the loss.  We have to face the sorrow of the wonderful life that has left us…  But you don’t have to face it alone.  You have each other— a wonderful gift.

I never met Bill but after having spent time learning more about him, I know he was a great patriarch, father, husband and citizen.   

In my neighborhood they say it takes a quote, unquote “Real man” to make boys.  I guess Bill was a man to the 3rd degree then because he had three sons—William, Jr. (Race), Troy, and Adam.  By the way, Peggy did have something to do with “making” three boys.

It is obvious from what I have learned about this family, there was a lot of love from this father and husband.    For me, it’s not so much the dinners you ate together or the activities you did as a family, they were special moments, rather it is the example of a life well lived that I admire the most.  Bill was an example for you and so many, and yet he was unassuming. One of his favorite songs describes his personality well, “Mister Cellophane” from the Chicago musical.  Some of the lyrics say: “You can look right through me, walk right by me, and never know I'm there.”  Bill had this way of not being the center of attention, yet somehow his presence was always felt.  A joke here, a witty response there and then “poof” Bill would disappear—as if he was never in the conversation or in the room.  Then he would appear again, make a cutting remark and “poof” he was gone again— but you’d still be laughing at what he said! Mister Cellophane should have been his name, indeed…

I cannot help but have admiration for a man who goes from being a star on the high school football team to defending the stars and stripes.  Bill enlisted, on his own accord, into the Navy, and became a veteran of World War II.  He loved his country.  He also loved his Peggy, and they enjoyed 56 years of marriage together.    He committed nearly as many years to his work as a Heavy Equipment Operator; and was active in the local union.   He loved discussing the Civil War and you’d had better know your stuff if you were discussing it with him!

 I cannot help but have admiration for a man who knew how to fix stuff.  I can’t fix much of anything—but Bill…  If something major broke in the house, did he call a professional in to fix it?  Oh no.  He would either fix it himself or if the job needed more workers, he’d recruit neighbors to tackle the task.  Bill would go get friends and their friends would get friends and everybody would chip in.  This is how the community was and this was Bill at his best with lots of jokes, smokes, food and friends—fixing a problem.  For Bill, being with friends was living—being alive.  He always knew how to make you feel comfortable and understood the power of friendship and working together.

This openness was also reflected in the Dowling residence too.  The Dowling’s house was almost always open to the neighborhood.   Everyone felt at home.  It’s funny—now I know where Race and Joyce get it from. They have picked up on a tradition of sharing, as their home is the source of many social functions among people here at Davies Church. 

For me, respect and admiration are earned and William Dowling, Sr. earned respect through his living example of love to his wife, sons, friends and whoever he met.  It’s no wonder why his boys never wanted to upset or disappoint him; and by the way, he never spanked or yelled at them (I can’t say the same about their mom ).  As Race said well, “Dad looked at you and mom screamed.”  There was a deep and profound respect the sons had for their father.   He told them on many occasions that they should focus on their lives and live by example.  He truly practiced what he preached and was a strong example of success.  He was a devoted husband, father, veteran, grandfather, and hard working tax paying American.  He was compassionate and generous and his beliefs followed what we call in the Unitarian Universalist Church, Principle #1 “respect for the inherent worth and dignity of all people.”  He believed this truly.  Most of all, he loved life and really expected the best out of everyone.   

I don’t know about you today, but when those final hours of life are left for me on this planet, I don’t want to talk about paying credit cards or bills, or sporting events, or those materials possessions that come and go.  I want to be with the ones I love and remember the love that I gave to others.  In Bill’s final days and hours, this is how it was, he was with those he loved—and what a blessing that was for him and for the family.

There is an old song of the church.  It says, “What shall I render unto God for all of the blessings?” or rather, “What shall I render unto life for all of its blessings?”  The song goes on to say, “All I can render is my body and my soul.  That is all I can render, that is all I can give.”  Bill gave his heart, mind, body and soul to anyone whom he met.  I can say today, “Well done good and faithful servant of humanity.  I was hungry and you fed me, naked and you clothed me, thirsty and you gave me drink.  So go now and be at peace for you have blessed us greatly, yet unassumingly, with your life and your love.”

I know, Bill, you believe that “you live on by the life you lead and the affect you have on those you leave behind,” and so, live on Bill Dowling.  Live on forever in us.  Live on in our memories—live on!”

I believe we all do have eternal life as long as we are remembered. When I look at Race and Troy and Adam and Peggy and the grandchildren, and all of you here today who knew Bill, I see and hear him alive in each one of you.  This is eternal life indeed, a gift that keeps on giving.  This love, this fire never dies and stays lit within us, as long as the chords of memory shall lengthen.

Live on William Dowling, Sr.  Live on Bill.  Live on “Pop- Pop”.  Live on Mister Cellophane man.  Live on father, husband and friend.  Live on good and faithful servant of humanity.  Live on.  Live on.  Live on!  Amen.